Caregiver Shame and Guilt with Dr. Judith Pilla: Watch Episode 158
November 13, 2026
Caregiving can bring a persistent feeling that you should know more, do more or manage every difficult moment perfectly. In episode 158 of A Time to Care: The Caregivers Podcast, Isabel Melgarejo welcomes psychotherapist Dr. Judith Pilla to explore the shame and guilt that can become part of that inner conversation.
Released on November 13, 2026, Caregiver Shame & Guilt: How to Stop Carrying the Emotional Burden is now available as a complete video conversation. The recording runs 35 minutes and 33 seconds.
Watch the full conversation
Watch episode 158 on YouTube, or visit the Podcast.co episode page for the listening version.
Meet Dr. Judith Pilla
Judith is a psychotherapist in private practice with more than two decades of experience working with individuals, couples, families and groups. Her research and clinical work focus extensively on shame. She is the author of How Shame Runs the World: Harness the Revolutionary Power of Our Most Misunderstood Emotion.
Her conversation with Isabel focuses on recognizing emotional messages and considering what they mean, rather than expecting caregivers to handle every responsibility or feeling perfectly.
Shame, guilt and the messages caregivers carry
The episode examines the distinction between shame and guilt, including how negative messages from other people can become part of the way caregivers speak to themselves. Family expectations, patterns passed between generations and social media are among the influences discussed.
The published episode description highlights these themes:
- Recognizing shame in your own thoughts and the messages you repeat to yourself.
- Understanding how shame may be projected onto caregivers by others.
- Exploring transgenerational shame and social comparison.
- Distinguishing corrosive shame that hurts from pro-social shame that can help people recognize boundaries or learn from actions.
This overview introduces the conversation's themes. The full recording provides Judith's discussion and context in her own words.
Questions to keep in mind as you listen
Which expectations do you recognize in your own experience? Which messages seem to come from family patterns or comparison with others? Does a particular thought point toward something you can learn, or does it simply add to the weight you are carrying?
These are invitations for reflection, not a test of whether you are doing caregiving correctly. The episode makes room to notice complicated feelings without turning them into another demand for perfection.
Keep the conversation going
For practical ideas beyond this episode, explore our article on caregiver self-care without guilt or learn about the Time to Care caregiver community.
This episode and overview are educational and are not a substitute for individualized mental health care. If you would like help understanding your own experience, consider speaking with a qualified professional.